Wednesday 27 January 2010

Brrrrrrrrr, etc!

Another cold day in paradise - I mean on the buses!

05:30...

Got to work in plenty of time, to find Mr. Redbreast waiting to nod, wink, and fly off, as if saying "Stuff this for a game of soldiers - I'm off back to bed!"

Can't say I blame you, mate. Wish I could burger off back to me pit too, but the ruddy bills aren't gonna pay themselves, dammit.

09:15...

OK, meandering around the various half asleep drivers and pedestrians on the route - I mean carefully navigating along the route, I came across a sign outside a well known chain of sandwich retailers, advertising their breakfast menu deal (sandwich, drink, cost... you know the format, of course)... It kind of goes almost without saying that it was VERY on-topic for most of the half dead zombies out there this morning...!

Of course, one bloody good way to fix the morning is, naturally, to bugger off back to bed.

I wish!

16:30...

Another candidate for Organ donation now... no photo, I regret to say, I was too busy trying not to kill the dense ***** by standing on the anchors...

I'd just served a bus stop on the route, closed the doors, checked the mirrors, indicated to pull out, checked the mirrors again, waited for a safe gap in the traffic before pulling away, released the brake, and moved off, when out of the blue, thankfully as I was doing the nearside segment of an all-round vision check (corners, front, nearside mirror, front, offside mirror, front, etc...), this dopey candidate for a mortitians scalpel, her mobile phone plastered to her ear, walked right out into the road two yards from the front of my bus, to get to her car - and opened the sodding thing as I was

  1. Probably swearing violently (I don't recall exactly, I know I yelled something, I just can't remember what!) and
  2. Laying rubber in anchoring up not a yard from her - thank the stars I was only doing a walking pace, having only just moved off from the bus stop.

She then had the temerity to blame ME for her insanity! Ye bleeding sobbing Gods! Just as well I had a stack of passengers calling her every name under the sun - saved me the trouble!

Can anyone add "Positive Darwinism"?

17:10...

The penultimate bit to the shift is here...

Observe the photo carefully... can you see the clues?

I'll add one more that's not in the photo... the sign that says "BUSES ONLY" at the entrance to the BUS STAND.

Hells Bells, the git only parked on the road paint that said, oddly enough, "BUS STOP" as well - I mean, how many more clues did this one want? A copper performing Valet Re-Parking, perhaps?

Muppit.

"Arfur! Get yer skates on, fer pities' sake!"

I meant to mention this the other day...

Heard over the iBus radio on a general broadcast...

"...Drivers be aware that at (road) in Barking, a car has fallen off the back of a lorry. Please use caution..." my mind tuned out at that point, imagining that somewhere in the East End, Messrs. Daley & Co. were jumping up and down in consternation at this good deal going begging, and the Old Bill already being on the way to sort it out!

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